2011 was really an interesting year. I would say that was the year that I changed. I went through so many experiences which broke me, and then ..made me. Well..still making me.

Was just thinking about it, that's all.
Something random.
Haha.

I wanna blog longer but henny's eating the siew pau which smells so good so I'm gonna go eat too :P

Today

Just finished CA2 exams! It's 1.50a.m Saturday morning, and I am tired like crazy. But I know I can sleep late, and wake up late..and go back to being a pig.

Well actually, I've never stopped being a pig even during exams. =.=''

Anyways, exams was bad. This is what happens when you study last minute. But then again, I didn't study last minute to be exact. I studied but I didn't reinforce it in time, so when it came to the day before the exam, I had to revise & memorise everything, and well, there just wasn't enough time. Cause the reinforcing was last minute. Sigh.

Dreading the results. I hope I don't fail. Though I know that won't happen. But still, pray & hope for the best.

And letting that go, because CA2 is over.

Also, I don't want to blog about my resolution of studying and doing better in CA3 because I'm just tired.
These past few weeks have been all about studying and stressing, I just want to ..relax.
For a bit.

Going home next week for Chinese New Year holidays!
Gotta go get bus tickets. I hope they're not sold out.

Karunya is going to Penang this weekend. So that leaves me and Henny. Maybe Darsh will come over too.
Just plan to laze around and catch up with each other.
(HAHA as if there's anything to catch up about. We're always talking & never shutting up anyways).

I guess maybe I can catch up on my FRIENDS (yes still haven't complete. forever in the same season la =.=) & HIMYM. It's been so long.

Oh my gosh, I'm planning as if I don't have finals to sit for.

RELAX JAAAAP JE.
HONESTLY.
NO LIE.

I'M HAPPY TODAY. Weee. :)
Are you? :P

Meet our christmas tree!

Haha yeah I know =.='' We were actually planning on getting a christmas tree for so long, to make our room more ''chrismassy''. But well.. Karu went drinking the other day and she got these two cards, and she made a 3D stick out kinda thing. Cool huh?

O.o''
Well, at least something, right? :)

Things that are currently on my mind

From least important to most :

- I don't like certain people's mentality where they're still in this small bubble that ..well, it's just plain SEXIST. Gender bias. And when you reason with them expecting a educational interesting discussion, all you get is crap. crap crap crap crap. O.o'' And then it's like they don't get the point because they don't listen, egoistic much.

- Need to go grocery shopping! :O Need to get shampoo, conditioner, FOOD, hair-tie (cause I lost mine and have been using Chimp's hairclip) ..so many things to buy.

- Thinking of going to watch Mayakam Yenna or something? Mum said to go watch. She NEVER asks me to go watch movies. Well, okay that's an overstatement. =.= She seldom does it. So I'm kinda curious about this. But I can't cause
(i) Exams are coming up
(ii) Henrina don't watch tamil movies, Karu going KL, Darsh already watched
(iii) EXAMS.

- Grace. Is she really out of my life for real? Is this it?

- Christmas :)

-Can't wait to go back home!! LIKE I WANT TO GO HOME RIGHT NOW.

-EXAMS :( :(

- Sigh hev. I'm sorry.

Next week

Exam week.

Not ready. I can't seem to remember my facts, and because there's a lot, I get more confused. The workload is piling up, and before I know it, I'm overwhelmed.

But I'll be heading back to KL on Friday. :)

Today Karunya said that she wants FRIDAY to come fast but that would mean CA would come fast too. Then I told her ''it's like they're playing with our minds, aren't they?'' ..haha..

Time is running fast. I just finished my critical review on Euthanasia, and it's already 12.15 a.m. I won't say what time I started :/ There's a secret recipe cake waiting for me in the fridge and the question : ''To eat..or not to eat'' is playing on my mind. I should go print the lab manual for all four of us , for our lab tomorrow. The printer's ready and everything, but I don't feel like printing. I don't feel like getting off my bed. I'm also really thirsty now. Darsh Darsh, seriously, drink water. I want to, but the water bottle is wayyyy over there.

No, it's not lazyness talking (not THIS time). Everyone is concentrating on getting their critical review done that the room is really quiet. I like this feeling. And I'm afraid if I moved a little, whether to get the cake, to print the manuals, or to drink water, I'd disrupt the silence.

..

Okay, silence is disrupted.
Off I go.

Youtube much?

Hahaha, I always find the comments on youtube hilarious! Some comments that is. Some are just, kinda rude but..ignore those=.= The cute ones are what makes me happy :)



Haha :)

Stuck In Reverse

Falling in love with Coldplay. Have them on shuffle the entire day today. I remember someone who was once important in my life, he was a huge fan of Coldplay, but it's funny that I chose to fall in love with Coldplay NOW. At this very moment.

Sometimes life's like that. :)

Notes in class?

And got caught.

Sigh, sorry Mr.Louise. =.=''
But thank God he didn't like, take it and read the note out loud to the entire class. :/

Henny, Karunya, Darshini & I.
PS : People call me Darsh and the other darsh - Darshini. :)
Henny's the biggest handwriting, Karu's the first one (and the orange one), Darshini's the 'wth?' and mine's the purple. :/ Shouldnt have used a very obvious colour, eh? =.=

I've got a friend

I've got this friend
I don't think you know her
She sings a simple song
It sounds a lot like his

Oh I've got this friend
Holding onto her heart
Like it's a little secret
Like it's all she's got to give

Ohh, if the right one came
If the right one came along
Ohh, if the right one came, along


I love watching people, observing them, watching the things they'll do when they think no ones watching. You can sorta have a glimpse into the kind of person they are. No, you can't know a person by just looking at them, but by bits and pieces of their actions, you sorta get a picture.

Of all people I watch, my favourite is when one does not do anything. He or she would just be sitting there and staring off, into the horizon, thinking. I love to see their facial expression, and the lines on the forehead as they think hard, their head filled with thoughts jumping here and there. I'd like to figure out what they're thinking but mostly, I just watch.

In AIMST, I get frustrated.. Because everyone's connected. I can sit and observe something, then finding something out through an observation, and I can sorta solve the problem because I observed someone else who has the answers. But then, I'm not the scriptwriter aren't I? I can't just play them like their chess pieces, eventhough I want to so much, because I know that would result in a happier ending.

But then again, we all need a little bit of sadness here and there right? Then we'd know to appreciate happiness. And there's no rush in that. All in good time. :)

It's like GOSSIP GIRL IN AIMST!

DRAMA. DRAMA. DRAMA.

The fun, the fights, the rumors, the gossips, the heartbreaks, the tears, the friendship, the laughters.
It's crazy.

And it scares me, that studies are right now not the main focus of my life.
No, it really is. It is the main focus, it's the distractions I guess.
And getting into dramas, are not the kind of person I am.
Its a totally different environment, that's for sure.

I can honestly tell you, that you guys will love watching us. THAT's how DRAMATIC we are. I don't think I'm dramatic though, but hanging out with dramatic people sorta get you there, don't you think? Like Jenny & Dan, and how they got involved.

I can't blog about what's going on/happened because
1) Too public
2) I'll let Gossip Girl do her job ;)

Yes, we have a ''gossipgirl'' in our bunch too. And yes, she has a blog. Good luck finding it. ;)

A part of me is happy, because at the end of this journey, the beginning of another, I can look back at this and see much more..more than books and notes and exams.

''you know you love me,
xoxo, gossip girl. ;)''

RANDOM

I was in the study area and then I felt like I couldn't breathe. Seriously, my asthma is catching up on me. =.= Then I went out and sat for a while, staring at the greens and the lake when I heard bells. I look up.

Saw this cute 3 year old girl dancing around by herself. She had anklets on her ankle and I'm guessing she loves hearing the bells. She keeps stomping her feet, pause for a bit (seemed like she was 'DIGESTING' the sound) then she giggles to herself.

Surprisingly, there were no one else around. It seemed like she was there by herself. I thought it odd, but decided to just watch her. She kept giggling to herself, and it was so cute.

Sure enough, around 15 minutes later, some girl came and carried her. She's an aimst student but ..yeah ive no idea how they're related. The kid started moaning, pointing to the ground, indicating she wanted to walk instead. I'm guessing she wasn't bored of the bells yet.

The elder girl refused to put her down..and what made me smile like crazy was that the little girl, the cute kiddo, eventhough she was being carried, she started swinging her feet at every direction she could. She could still hear the bells.

Aww. :)

When you're with someone SUPERSKINNY

You look SUPERFAT. :p


superskinny =.=
I love this t-shirt :D Bought it at TESCO KEDAH :p Went to the clinic because I couldn't take coughing so much. Guess what? I'm getting my asthma back! =.= NOT HAPPY AT ALL. Tons of meds to take. :(

I know I look happy. But that's because it rained. :)

Heartbreaks

The other day I was sitting and talking to Sugentha when Vi messaged. I was halfway replying the text when Sugentha went all ''Ooooo your boyfriend??'' .. Me ''Um, nope=.= Vivian :)'' .. She - ''Yeah but don't lie I know you have a boyfrienddddd'' .. me ''Err ..no lahhhhh'' .. she '' Don't lie laaa pandi. You so prettyyyy and girly girl sure many guys like you. Not like mee.. So saddd ahhh :(''

The conversation went on to how I explained to her how awesome she is and her denying it.

Sugentha is a really awesome person. She says the most randomest things that can literally crack me up until I had to sit down on the floor to stop myself from laughing, because my stomach hurts so much. She's really loving and caring, and very thoughtful too. Like, when I refused to eat because of *the F word*, she literally fed me. =.= When some of my friends left their plates at the cafe table and left, she didn't want to burden the cleanliness dude, so she took all the plates and put them at the wash section. Ain't she sweet? I couldn't help thinking about the way she feels.

But guys, well not ALL (ain't gonna stereotype cause I know a few wonderful guys) are so influenced by the mass media, about 'hot' and 'sexy'. My friends here told me that guys have that checklist, and that they wouldn't give the time of the day to someone who does not qualifies the list, as in, they won't think about them in that way.

I know the immaturity of this but it's sorta already been proven. I know tons of guys like that. I'm friends with them.

Like Sugentha for example. She may not be 'the dream' but I for one, thinks she's beautiful and wonderfully perfect. :) I understand that yes, it's those guys' loss for not knowing how wonderful she really is but it sucks that they make someone as wonderful as her feel so horrible about herself.

GRR. PISSED GILERRR.

And beside me another heartbreak story. :( Sigh..sedihnye.
Makes me wanna go beat those guys up. =.=

Oh yes, I'm VERY capable.
Don't mess with me. GRR.

Sometimes it lasts in love

But sometimes it hurts instead..

- Someone Like You by Adele. :( Everyone gets sad when they listen to this. Divv, Karu, Henrina..it's like, a bunch of ADELE EMO FREAKS. :/ They'll listen to it in class too and emo. Sigh drama people. I'm the worst though. I cry. =.=''

Past experience or not, nonetheless, it is a good song.

And I love this video.

I cried at that too.

The lyrics :

I heard
That you're settled down
That you
Found a girl
And you're
Married now

I heard
That your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things
I didn't give to you

Old friend
Why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back
Or hide from the light

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead.
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead,
Yeah.

You know how the time flies
Only yesterday
It was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise
Of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead.

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known
How bittersweet this would taste?

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I beg
"I'll remember", you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead.

Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead.

VINOSHA, go listen to this. :P Since you're always asking me for songs.. haha.. :)

The life of a medical student is full of drama. And I just started.
This is going to be interesting ;)

I'm making full use of my VIVAZ PRO WHITE. :P

Yes not like THE IPHONE but, I'm thankful I have a phone! :) :) And it's soo cool. Can slide it up with the keypads..and act all professional padahal mcm kid excited :P

Am I really getting older or younger? I feel like I'm aging backwards =.=''

Meet grace's bunny! .. Guess what's it's name?

BUNNY! :D

I've always been afraid of him..since last time, cause of the way it's body vibrates.. And all of a sudden he just runs..super fast..then at times he just SITS there, staring.. =.='' UNPREDICTABLE GILERRR..

Afraid to hold him but I've improved tons! :D
FAKE SMILE.. =.= I was thinking ''OHH NOO BUNNY DON'T JUMP ON ME''

Grace torturing her bunny. :P

I used to have rabbits when I was younger and still lived in puchong. It was a birthday present from dad. Came home from school one day when Arun came running out screaming ''APPA BOUGHT RABBITS FOR YOU!! BUT I WANT THEM!!'' .. and I was like ''Don't lie please =.='' cause my mum can't stand animals. But sure enough, as we entered the house, ta-da :D I was happy giler.

Then one of 'em died. The snowy white one. I cried for days.. =.= Then mum gave away the other black one so that we won't kill him too.. :( ..

Then my dad bought goldfishes.. :D And we were excited again :D Wee, fishes, so cool kan? :D ..

We killed them too. All of them. :(

Hari & Vino always had pets in their house. Ever since I can remember. It's either the dogs or the birds, or ..well, surely something. And everytime they had puppies, Hari would call me and I'd BEG for one. But mum would always say NO. So I only played with them during sleepovers ..

Then abishek & Arvindra came into this world (dramatic) and my dad bought hamsters :D Two hamsters.

One died.

My dad bought another one.

The old one died.

My dad bought another one.

Both died.

=.=

KILLER FAMILY.

Out of topic. yes you caught me. I don't want to study.. T.T
But I have to.. so yeahh..

Ciaoo :)

Because Karunya lost her iphone with MILLIONS of pictures in them :(

Ta-da. Make do with second best :P :

In starbucks, we bumped into two kids, who sat and played UNO with us. So cute :) .. And funny thing was, everyone thought they didn't know how to play UNO so they kept bullshitting the kids (not me, I was busy aww-ing at their cuteness haha).. that even when they lost, Sugentha was all ''You have the MOST cards! yay you win!'' .. :) Towards the end though, the girl was teaching her younger bro how to play UNO.. and she was teaching him the RIGHT way.. I burst out laughing like crazy, everyone's expression was PRICELESS. :p

Sugentha teaching them high5s :)

The other day in a BORING class.. Henrina & Thiva sits in front of me. Sigh thiva and that killer stare .. Like he wants to eat me up..grr =.=

Divvan on my left, playing the ipad. Concentrating right? :P

Karunya on my right, don't know doing what o.o''

Henrina & I :p

In the bus on the way back from KL to SG.PETANI. Reva & Ashvinia :)

Back in KL, we had our 3 in 1 birthday party celebration at the park. So the very funny. :P Hilarious gilerr..people were staring at us. Oh well, we party like we're rockstars kan? - so called :P .. Grace & Vi was like high that day. I was - T.T- cause going back to Kedah the next day.. :'(

I miss them oh so badly. :(

There's Always A Place In Me You Can Call Home

Finished studying today's stuffs, and it's not even 6pm yet. I'm a happy child. :)

I guess I'll study some more tonight, and then I can sleep peacefully. Reva was right after all, ''keep at your own pace. It's only when you start following others' paces, that's when you screw up.'' .. My pace is just fine. :)

In CUCMS, everyday was sorta about studying, studying studying.. but in AIMST, honestly, dramaaa gilerrr.. :o You wouldn't really know but I'm quite an observer (people-watching, it's a wonderful hobby really) ..it's not that I'm poking into other people's business, it's just that I happen to see and hear all the wrong things at the right time. =.='' And I don't like it.. I like just having my head filled with education, than stories about other people's lives and lies. =.='' TAK. NAK.

:)

Anything that´s worth having
Is sure enough worth fighting for
Quitings out of the question
When it gets tough gotta fight some more
We gotta fight fight fight fight fight for this love
We gotta fight fight fight fight fight for this love
We gotta fight fight fight fight fight for this love
Its worth having its worth fighting for


Henrina keeps replaying this song over & over again. Giving me semangat haha.. :)

RANDOM

Sunburned terribly =.=''

Back in Kedah and gearing up studying everyday. Kononya everyday actually =.= since it's just my second day back today :P I should go study now..

I've a feeling I'm falling sick. Sore throat, headaches, body ache. But no wayy, I WON'T fall sick. Not here, and definitely NOT NOW. Darshini's immune system, work HARDER please.

Drinking lots of water than I've ever drank in a day before, but yet, somehow I still don't feel enough :P I'm going swimming later, I think. I'm not sure.. I'm sleepy, but need to study..choices, choices choices..

''We keep running after people who least care about us.
Why don't we just stop, turn around. and see the ones running behind us.''

I've got LOTS to blog about, but I've been just saving it in my head, hoping someday, I'd find the time.
Someday. =.=

Gotta go study, have an awesome week! :)

At The Beach

That's where I am and where you're not :P

''Taking the easy way out''

I've been disappointing a lot of people lately. And for reasons that I don't think it's fair to be angry at me about.

Let's take a look at the situation here. I've been in Kedah for the past 3 weeks and I'm back for one week since it's the Raya hols. I have best friends and many other awesome friends who wants to meet up. And the feeling's mutual. I haven't seen them all in a VERY long time and yes, I miss them like crazy.

And then one day last week, dad called me up and told me about taking a family vacation to PD. I told him I made plans with my friends and if it's possible to have the vacation sometime in the middle of the week. He says okay. However yesterday, he told me that he already booked and paid for this posh hotel for Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday. Everyone is going.

So I had to tell all my friends that I couldn't make it on what we initially planned but if it's okay to postpone. But instead I got lots of angry people at my back that they can start an angry club about me.

I'm sorry but family comes first. I'm sorry for last minute cancelling but I was told last minute too. It wasn't cause I don't want to, I pretty much don't have a choice because it's not just MY schedule, it's everyone else's too. Like my dad, he's only free the first half of the week. Arun is back from RMC the first half of the week. I understand that they have their schedule too and that they're pretty much busy on every other day of the week. So either reschedule, or forget about meeting up. Don't go all emotional saying I don't care because if that's what you think of me, then maybe you don't know me at all.

A part of me is really angry that I feel like never coming back to KL just to stay out of this stupid dilemma. But another part of me feels happy.

To have a huge group of people angry at me that they couldn't meet up with me for the hols.

Usually (from other people's experiences), when one can't meet up, everyone just go ''it's okay, next time then :)'' but instead, I got ''FINE. WHATEVER.''s and ''Right. I saw this coming. You don't really care, do you?'' .. that really accounts for something right?

In this midst of all this anger, frustrations and jealousy, I guess I'm feeling all the love.

Thank you. :)
And I'm sorry.

I will make it up to you all, someday.

When I say something and someone else has a say in it, it usually doesn't work out. Not because of me, it's because of them.
But this is ME making a promise, that only I can fulfill.
I stay true to MY word.

It's up to you to believe me.