Paperweight

Been up all night
Staring at you
Wondering what's on your mind
I've been this way
With so many before
But this feels like the first time
You want the sunrise
To go back to bed
I want to make you laugh

Mess up my bed with me
Kick off the covers
I'm waiting
Every word you say I think
I should write down
I don't want to forget
Come daylight

Happy to lay here
Just happy to be here
I'm happy to know you
Play me a song
Your newest one
Please leave your taste on my tongue
Paperweight on my back
Cover me like a blanket

And no need to worry
That's wasting time
And no need to wonder
What's been on my mind
It's you
It's you

Every word you say I think
I should write down
Don't want to forget
Come daylight

And I give up
I let you win
You win 'cause I'm not counting
You made it back
To sleep again
Wonder what you're dreaming

Holidays

I'm ecstatic.
That it's the holidays.

I've been waiting to come home for SO LONG.
Like SO LONG.

During my exam week, I lived every day countdown-ing to Friday. Pity hev, he's my victim.

(the week before)

''Hev, guess what?''

''What?''

''Thursday Friday Saturday Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday FRIDAY!!''

(the next monday)

''Hev, guess what?''

''What?''

''Tuesday Wednesday Thursday FRIDAY!''

(the next day)

''Hev, guess what?''

''What?''

''Wednesday Thursday FRIDAY!!!''

(the following day)

Hev ''Ehh bi, guess what?''

Me '' What? ''

Hev '' Thursday FRIDAY!!''



Haha :) And then, the unexpected happened. Mum called and turns out, they got the days mixed up. That instead of going home on friday, I'd go home on Saturday..and stay a day in Kedah. I cried, a lot, mostly because I can't believe my own parents would get the dates mixed up after my CONSTANT reminders about 21st October 2011.

But then, change of plans because I would be left alone in AIMST (since everyone, LITERALLY everyone, went home on that day afternoon). I followed my uncle and his two girls to PENANG, stay with them (he has some conference) and follow them back to KL the next day.

And I'd say, it was an AWESOME beginning to my holidays.
It seriously was.
Because of the two angels.

My babies. :)

The minute my mum said his daughters will be there, I was all YES! OKAY! SURE! ..though still down, but what's the point right?
And yeah, awesome beginning.

Kaushalya skyping with Hev waaayy past her bedtime. See the excitement and the sleepiness on her face? haha :)



Khaush playing with my fingers on the way home.



The best part of the ride? She slept on me, my arm over her shoulders. She slept while playing with my hand, so for the next hour, she was just clutching my hand, softly.
It was raining outside.
:)

Taken in the hotel room. Was skyping again when Harshini pulled open the curtains and the light was gorgeous. :) Then they went to the window admiring the light, and I thought it looked beautiful. So I took out my phone and asked them to do random poses and I took this picture.


They attempted to be 'models' but instead, all I can think about when I look at this picture is
Freedom.
Light.
Flying.
Dreams.
High.

I reached home happy. Turns out staying up north one day extra, reaching home late one day later, was not such a waste after all.

And this upcoming week are full of plans to meet up with loved ones.
I've a feeling this is going to be such an awesome week. :)

Oh yeah, I've homework.
Screw that assignment lahhhh. :)

Ha. ha. I wish. Of course I'll do it.
Just, not yet.

CYBER TOMORROW!
With him. :)

VIVIAN TAN BO YEE

You're my best friend in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD -I feel like a 6year old O.o'' haha

But it's true. I'm sorry I've been hurting you with my 'awesome' time-management, my sleepyness, always saying the wrong things at the wrong time. If I'm you, I'd get so annoyed. I don't even know how you put up with me.

You're so strong. You have a horrible best friend and yet, you're always there for her. You're amazing, you know that?

I'm going to try to be awesome-er too. Awesome like you.
I don't want to hurt you anymore and make you feel sad all the time.
I won't want to constantly feel bad when we fight all the time.
I DON'T want to fight all the time.

I'm going to try to be better.
I can't promise you that the change would be immediately, cause everything takes time, right?
This too, takes time.

Bear with me on this okay?

I love you, like freaking a lot. :)
Can't wait to see you on tuesday, we have SO MUCH to catch up on.

And we'll be doing this for many more years to come.
I can promise you THAT. :)

''I miss the past form of you'' - REPLY

A reply to thisposthere

I'm sorry for the very late reply..had exams and stuffs.

And hey, that girl is so not lost at all. It's still in me. I'm still me. It's just, change as in, yes you're right, adapting to the new environment.

You know how they say that when you mix with a certain group of people, as time passes, you sorta have similar characteristics..like them? I guess it's the same with me too. And I can tell, some are sorta good. I've gained self confidence, I can carry out conversations without feeling all insecure.. these people helped (is helping) me let go and start over. I hang out with them a lot, and I can see myself having the similar traits.

Before this, I was sorta down about it. I felt like I'm letting go of myself, and being someone else. But then, now I'm starting to like the person I am. This is me, getting out of my shell, trying out new things, stepping out of my comfort zone.. And you know how rarely that happens. I'm usually just comfortable with a small group of people and fearing everything that is unfamiliar. But things are changing.

You say you admire the person i was back then. And I'm guessing it's those traits you've told me about. Hey, I still have those traits. It just, I may have wavered off here and there, but I'm still me.

And I'm never letting me go.
I'm never letting you go.

I don't walk out of people's lives, despite what some might think. I have my reasons for doing the things I do. They may not be the RIGHT reasons, but trust me, they are reasons in your favour. It's always in other people's favour when it comes to me. Once I love someone, I love. And that doesn't stop. No matter what happens.

Even when people change.
Even when people leave.
Even when people hurt me,
humiliate me,
curse me,
use me..

I don't stop. I always wish I can change that part about myself, that I can stop easy, or move on easy, but I'm not like that.
And this applies to you too.
In this case, I left, I would like to say I left not by choice, but that would be lying. I did leave by choice, however it's due to circumstances.
But that doesn't mean you're not important anymore.
That doesn't mean I don't love you.

It just means there's distance between us, and we gotta work harder in keeping contact, that's all.
And since I'm gonna meet you tomorrow, I think we're doing just fine.

You'll see me tomorrow.
The brand new me.
Which is a mixture of the old me, and a few changes here and there.
I hope you like it.

Let me know. :)

I said

''I'm sorry I'm difficult''

He said,

''Well baby, nothing good comes easy''

I know I have huge trust issues, but with you, it's easy.
And I don't even wonder why.

Next week

Exam week.

Not ready. I can't seem to remember my facts, and because there's a lot, I get more confused. The workload is piling up, and before I know it, I'm overwhelmed.

But I'll be heading back to KL on Friday. :)

Today Karunya said that she wants FRIDAY to come fast but that would mean CA would come fast too. Then I told her ''it's like they're playing with our minds, aren't they?'' ..haha..

Time is running fast. I just finished my critical review on Euthanasia, and it's already 12.15 a.m. I won't say what time I started :/ There's a secret recipe cake waiting for me in the fridge and the question : ''To eat..or not to eat'' is playing on my mind. I should go print the lab manual for all four of us , for our lab tomorrow. The printer's ready and everything, but I don't feel like printing. I don't feel like getting off my bed. I'm also really thirsty now. Darsh Darsh, seriously, drink water. I want to, but the water bottle is wayyyy over there.

No, it's not lazyness talking (not THIS time). Everyone is concentrating on getting their critical review done that the room is really quiet. I like this feeling. And I'm afraid if I moved a little, whether to get the cake, to print the manuals, or to drink water, I'd disrupt the silence.

..

Okay, silence is disrupted.
Off I go.

You're pretty awesome with your guitar.

Just thought of letting ya know that. :)

p/s Blogging this when you're playing..

:P

Youtube much?

Hahaha, I always find the comments on youtube hilarious! Some comments that is. Some are just, kinda rude but..ignore those=.= The cute ones are what makes me happy :)



Haha :)

Stuck In Reverse

Falling in love with Coldplay. Have them on shuffle the entire day today. I remember someone who was once important in my life, he was a huge fan of Coldplay, but it's funny that I chose to fall in love with Coldplay NOW. At this very moment.

Sometimes life's like that. :)

We were free like water, flowing down under the warmth of the sun

4th October 2011, 2.32 a.m :)


''And as we lie, beneath the stars,
we realise how small we are,
if they could love like you and me,
imagine what the world could be''

I was holding on to you, like someone broken,
and you told me..

'Just let me hold you while you're falling apart..
just let me hold you and we'll both fall down
Fall on me'

Hey,thanks for letting me fall on you.
You make my 'everyday' beautiful..
Who'd knew we would be an 'us' ? .. :)

ps : Yesterday just keeps replaying over and over on my mind. It waskinda perfect. :)



pps : So can't believe you slept early tonight! grr.. But hey, a part of me is happy that you fell asleep .. so then you wouldn't be awake to keep me up so late. :P Kidding.. :) Goodnight, love.

Random

Everything worth having...

Comes with trials worth withstanding.

Anyways...

You can clearly see what I'm missing right now. :(

Sometimes you don't know you're falling in love until you've fallen.

I guess this time I'm very lucky that someone's there to catch me.
Thank you..


So what now? ... :)

:)

Officially a closed chapter.

The beginning of another book. :)

Notes in class?

And got caught.

Sigh, sorry Mr.Louise. =.=''
But thank God he didn't like, take it and read the note out loud to the entire class. :/

Henny, Karunya, Darshini & I.
PS : People call me Darsh and the other darsh - Darshini. :)
Henny's the biggest handwriting, Karu's the first one (and the orange one), Darshini's the 'wth?' and mine's the purple. :/ Shouldnt have used a very obvious colour, eh? =.=