Vaanam

I just watched an awesome movie. One of the best I've seen recently, and it goes on my list of FAVORITE MOVIES and list of MOVIES I FORCE PEOPLE TO WATCH.

So if you received my text about this movie, that's me FORCING you to watch! :) haha, yeap, I sent to a whole bunch of people.. :D

So this movie. It's about 5 different stories,with a connection. Yes, I WANT to tell you about it! :)

But I won't, cause I don't want to ruin it for you :)
And you know how much STRENGTH I need to not tell you right ==

So basically, this movie centers about God, and how he lives in people. How you can see Him when people do random act of kindness. A person who had done many crimes can repent, and that very act of repenting, shows God.

It's a beautiful movie. None of these characters are perfect..some lead hard lives. And yet, in the end, they showed God lives in them. They changed for the better.

The character who was crazy about becoming rich sacrificed his life for others. A guitarist, who only cared about music and nothing else, saved someone and end up loosing his hand. A prostitute repented. A police who was racist was saved by the man he had been bullying. And so many more.

There's this one song which I love, about 'Where is God?'..the song then went on about war, starvation, disease, deaths.. but then it concluded with ..God lives in the people who does kindness..

''God lives in our hearts''

I cried during the entire movie! and all the way home! I had to stare out the window so my family would not notice..but then everyone outside saw me crying =='' I even have tears in my eyes while typing this.

The entire movie was a journey, a life-changing one. This movie is one movie where I will FORCE my kids to watch. haha :)

:D

Okay, I'm feeling so hyped now that the exams are over. Now I won't feel guilty when I sleep too long or watch movies or read novels.. I feel free. :)

So 3 months! All to myself. What am I to do? :) :) :)

* Read NOVELS!
I haven't touch one in AGES! I miss the smell, the stories, the way I get so absorbed into them. I plan on heading to the bookshop A.S.A.P and get a nice book! :)

* Exercise
Need to lose weight. :( All my clothes are so tight, and mum refuses to buy me any more. So it's either I loose weight or I go naked. ==''

*Eat like a pig
I can't wait to eat food other than cyberia's food!! :D (yes I know it's so contradicting to the first but .. a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do right?)

* Spend time with FAMILY
I miss my grandparents :(

* Catch up on all those movies and series I've been missing out on.
Gossip girl! Glee! Desperate Housewives! :D

*Spend time with Vi and Grace!!
Miss my best friends!!!!

* Nature
I want to SEE nature again :)

* Piano
I have not touch my piano for so long, my fingers feel so stiff. I miss my music. :(

* Babies!
Okay, I'm yearning for babies :) Um, no I don't mean MY OWN (though I'd like that better!) but well, yeah, I want to spend time with kids, babies. Just looking at their innocence makes my day. :) After a few hours with them though, ANNOYED. hahaha :D Nah kidding. That only happens with my brothers.

* Sleep
Sleep and not setting an alarm to wake up :)

*God
:)

And well, there's tons! And I will accomplish them. Oh, the loosing weight part. If you see me after 3 months and I look the same, or gained more weight, please..please HIT me. I mean it.

Oh wait, where was I again?
Oh yeah!
HOLIDAY!!! xD
Though I'm so NOT looking forward to the results. :(

But then again, I'll save those worries for another day :)

EXAMS. DONE. OVER. GONE.

Byebye :)

HELLO HOLIDAYS!

Everytime We Touch

I still hear your voice when you sleep next to me
I still feel your touch in my dreams
Forgive me my weakness, but I don't know why
Without you it's hard to survive

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling
And everytime we kiss, I swear I could fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast?
I want this to last
I need you by my side

?Cause everytime we touch, I feel the static
And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky
Can't you hear my heart beat so?
I can't let you go
I want you in my life

Your arms are my castle, your heart is my sky
They wipe away tears that I cry
The good and the bad times, we've been through them all
You make me rise when I fall

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling
And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast?
I want this to last
I need you by my side

'Cause everytime we touch, I feel the static
And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky
Can't you hear my heart beat so?
I can't let you go
I want you in my life

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling
And everytime we kiss, I swear I could fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast?
I want this to last
I need you by my side

Housebunnies :)

A day when we had exams the next day and because of feeling so stressed up, Meera made us up and we had a photoshoot of our own. :)
Taranya was in her room, she didn't want to join us, haha.. Said we were 'KIDS'.

What sucked was that we all can't be in a picture because we need someone to hold the camera. :/

This journey here in this apartment has been, interesting. Tons of ups and downs. We started out with 8 girls in the apartment, and now, towards the end of foundation, 5 of us left. Two moved out, one moved to another college.. and yeah. I feel like this is a lesson. A lesson God wants us to learn. Just us. And that was why Youwannia moved out. Sobha moved out. Because E-33-AB teaches a lesson which was not meant for them. A lesson was meant for the 5 of us.

I won't deny, they have been times we felt like hitting and screaming at each other. And then we work out our differences, and end up hugging and taking pics, haha. Now thinking about it, if I had end up in an apartment where everyone had the same characters, the same fashion sense, the same religion, I wouldn't have learned anything. I would not have grow and mature. Heck, I'd still be the same person when I moved here. Learning from differences. We sticked together through thick and thin.

The thing is, it's okay if you're hot tempered, if you're annoying, if you can't stop singing when you're studying. What matters is that you're true. I'd pick an annoying true friend over a sweet fake friend any day. :)
Oh, and also, growing together, improving to be a better person.

This will be ending this sunday when we give our keys up. It's been one heck of a ride girls. :)
E-33-AB rocks. :)
Love you girls. Haha, we'll always be housebunnies.

Yasmin, Husna, Meera, Taranya.

And also you Fatin. Even though you're not here with us till the end of foundation, you're still a housebunny.

When you hang out with a group of people most of the time, you tend to have their characteristics, and they tend to have yours. Things you've said before, you may now hear it from someone else. In fact, I realise I'm starting to laugh like Husna.. :P In the end, I'll be walking out of here with each and everyone of you in me.

And thus, the story of these five different girls who build an AMAZING friendship..will be buried in the walls of apartment E-33-AB forever.

:)

Bon Odori

Oh! Another short post!

Thank you my Bon Odori Dance group! You guys did awesome :) And yes, the comments the judges gave (the negative ones), they are indeed true. And we should improve on all that, yadda yadda yadda. :) Take everything as a lesson. :)

Thanks for all the time, and the willingness of you guys to learn, and accept criticism well. Sorry for all those times I um..push you off the cliff or something. Just want you guys to fly. :)

(err..okay crapping, It's cause I'm sleepy)

Anyways, good one! Had fun doing this with you!
Another awesome memory gained!

L.O.V.E :)

Um right.

So we had the cultural night tonight .. Well, I guess now it's LAST NIGHT cause it's 2a.m in the morning. Won't blog much but just this small thing to say, about the Eunuch's presentation.

Well, with respect, in my opinion *though I know no one's asking for it but yeah, syok sendiri ..biasa lah ==*, I don't see the whole ''It's improper'' .. ''It's obscene'' ..''As a woman, I feel insulted'' .
??

Why you wonder? Because this group presented castration in men, and they used a model, made out of a plastered balloon to represent the penis and the scrotum of the men (and yes, they showed the actual cutting of it). And the judges got pissed. They refused to watch. One of them walked out. And the head judge refused to give any marks.

The irony ? We're a MEDICAL college.

Funny ain't it? We're gonna be trained medicine practitioners, and we're going to deal with this kind of thing in the future, but for them it's an insult. ?

MEDICAL COLLEGE???
MEDICAL?
MEEEEDDDDIIIIIICCCAAAALLLL?

I agree it would be improper if it is done in, I dont know, a primary school, secondary school. talk show, family gathering..
But a culture presentation in a MEDICAL COLLEGE?
Their group was the only ONE of the two groups that presented a culture and still connected them to the medical field. (we have 10 groups in total). So I think that's actually pretty excellent.

I don't think what they did was obscene. In fact, I am VERY PROUD of them for taking on such a big topic, a heavy one too, than the rest of us who did things like The Bon Odori Dance. They took a risk, and they presented it well. If only the judges would look pass the ''improper-ness'' , then they would see it was a good presentation as they got the message across well.

Oh, and I'm also proud of my friends to have done it maturely, unlike some other KIDS my age who I know would be playing around.

Okay, emotions aside, the judges should have used CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. Instead of
''As a woman, I feel INSULTED'' , perhaps something more of a ''I don't think this is proper, especially since there are ladies in the room'' ..or something.

Science shows people learn better with constructive criticism. Honestly, look it up.


But who am I to say anything right? I am not an experienced professor with 30 years of teaching. So yeah, we should listen to the lecturers. Perhaps they would have done better by taking something light, maybe about food or a dance. Then it won't be insulting. Plus who knows? Doctors may have to perform in hospitals too.

*please note all the sarcasms used in this blog post*

P/S : Bloggers are entitled to their point of view. TQ. :)

Last lap

Heading to Old Town later to study the entire night. And probably, will be doing this for the next few days.

Why? Finals is next week.
The end of foundation.

We gotta give everything we've got. :)
And I INTEND to do my best.

Wish me/us luck!! :)

'' I used to listen to it all the time when I was little and thinking about grown-up things. I would go to my bedroom window and stare at my reflection in the glass and the trees behind it and just listen to the song for hours. I decided then that when I met someone I thought was as beautiful as the song, I should give it to that person. And I didn’t mean beautiful on the outside.

I meant beautiful in all ways. ''

Sunflower

Mr.Eric, out of the blue, told us to take out a paper and some colours..and draw a sunflower. O.o''
Then he said to sign our names beneath it and add a quote. O.o''

I was not ready for the the Bio quiz after Mr.Eric's class, so I was trying to finish my 'masterpiece' as fast as I could to continue studying for the quiz. I gave no thought to the shape or size or..anything. I kept erasing my flower though, we all know how AWESOME at drawing I am.

Anyways, at first I drew a small sunflower, but when I saw Vino and Taranya drawing theirs HUGE, I erased mine and drew mine huge too. But then Mr.Eric said to not look at other's pic as it means something. So I stopped glancing over my shoulders and just drew.

I drew a wilting sunflower in a vase..With falling petals. I didn't use any colours, just black and white. Had shadows here and there.
I thought it was pretty alright, because usually.. well.. you know. =/

Anyways, Mr.Eric then went on to explain what each flower represents or show for us as a being. Mero's was happy, cheerful. Priyaa's was freedom, she likes to be free. Izureen's was complicated and detailed. Liyana's was cute, like her, haha.. Taranya's and Vinosha's was 'SO INDIAN' ..I find that hilarious in a way. How can one be so..himself/herself? How can one NOT be?

Well, mine? Mine showed that i think a lot. That I was sad. That I've gone through some very sad things in life. But my quote showed that I still have hope and a positive outlook on life.

True? Maybe.
I sucked at the Bio quiz after that. :/

Feelings?

Need to learn how to express my feelings. Not good at that.. I hope it's easy, because then it makes everything else easier. It shouldn't be hard right, to tell someone how much they mean to you? I envy my group of friends here at college, how they express everything. When the feel like saying 'I love you' they say it, at the top of their voices, most of the time with bonus hugs and kisses. And when I receive them, I just smile. Why is it so hard for me to say 'I love you' ..hard to say 'I miss you' or 'I'm scared' or 'Dad, can I have some money to go buy a dress for GFE?'..

It's hard for me to do all those, and because of that, I end up screwing up lots of situations.

It shouldn't be that way, especially not to your family. It doesn't come easy to me. And that is one thing I yearn the most.

I remember a month ago, my housemates and I were sitting around playing QUESTIONS, and the topic was 'Describe the guy one is suitable with'.. And when it was my part, they went on saying something like ''Very romantic, passionate, funny, expressive''..and the reason?
Because I'm an introvert. =/

So, to you reading this, if you're family (doubt that) or friend ...or anyone. I'm sorry if you feel that..I don't feel anything for our relationship. I'm sorry I'm robotic and don't really convey much..sometimes not at all. I'm sorry you're always the giver, and I'm always the receiver.

But honestly, I feel so much. Much more than you think.

Change

I feel like I'm approaching a change. A point where everything will no longer be the same anymore. Maybe it's because it's already the end of foundation in 2 weeks. Maybe it's because finals is next week. Maybe it's because we're approaching the Grand Final Event. Maybe it's because we have to return our apartment keys on the 1st May 2011.

Or maybe it's because CUCMS MBBS license have been revoked. Maybe it's because there is a chance I won't get in. Maybe it's because there is a chance I have to move out. Maybe it's because there's a chance I've to repeat foundation somewhere else. Or maybe it's because there's is a HUGE chance of me going and studying overseas instead.

Which is a huge risk according to my parents because I'm not healthy. And they won't be there to rush me to the hospital like how they do here.

But then again, that's what being independent is about isn't it?

I'm not ready yet, I think. For a change.
Not one that is so big like this.

I'm afraid of changes. Always have, and most probably always will be.
I've done it before, when entering CUCMS, and I thought I'd be okay, won't be able to go through another change for the next few years.

But of course.
Changes are inevitable.

Say NO to PIZZAs

I think I'm already phobia of pizzas. Today, there were this group of people having like a pizza promotions from Dominos .. And they wouldn't want to take NO for an answer. Whichever reason I gave them, they found points to counter them. --'' He said he'll take TWO minutes of our time, but ..well, it felt longer than two minutes. And I wasn't even paying attention to anything he was saying. I was thinking of excuses..and my lunch. And knowing me, I can't give them a firm NO and walk off.. So instead I nod and nod and interrupt in between ..but they keep cutting me off. Vino too. Then I said we have to go check with out housemates before we can make any deal, THATs when they let us go, but they WAITED for us even after class. =='' So we followed Meera in the car.

But I just realised the PERFECT REASON to turn them down.

''Um..sorry, I don't really like pizzas.'' :)

Oh!

Oh! And one more thing..when Meera was describing me, she said she loved how close I am with God.

That caught me off guard.
Because..I've never prayed out loud. I don't go around talking about Him and stuffs..not confidently. I guess it's because, I get scared. I don't know if I'm doing it right, or if I should be doing what I'm doing, saying what I think. But in my head, I have conversations with Him all the time. Like a friend. I'm always talking to him, but silently, on the inside.

But she noticed it. I don't remember ever telling her or talking to her about it, but she noticed. And that made me happy.
It made me feel real. Like, my relationship with Him, was not just in my head, I wasn't faking anything, it clearly showed. That how much I valued Him, how much I care.

Someone noticed. :)

PCP & Reflection

So today all the groups manage to present about their respective culture given, and our next surprise? Miss Fiza gave us another topic to present about next week (we NEVER get breaks ==). But THIS time, I'm not complaining. I think none of us are. We're actually pretty psyched about this presentation because..we're presenting about world's greatest mysteries and conspiracies!

My group got the Bermuda Triangle.. other groups, have Atlantis the Lost City, Route 66, Area 51, Friday the 13th, the ruins of Ponpei and the Mona Fandey case. All these cases are pretty interesting. If you haven't read about it, go ahead. :)

Then, we had reflection today, after SO MANY WEEKS. I think our apartment is the most lenient of them all. In fact, when Vino got to know about our reflection, she teasingly asked ''Oh, you guys HAVE reflection??''.. haha, tahulah, korang disiplin ..bukan macam kita :D (YES, I'll stop ruining BM now ==).

Today's reflection was pretty awesome. Meera was the chairperson, and the topic for today is Happiness. First question was ''What's your definition of happiness?'' . .followed by ''Are you happy?'' .. I loved everyone's answers at this part. Sweet, a bit bitter, but sweet. My answer was ''um, I think so? I've never thought about it, but yeah, okay la'' == And then, we started telling what we learned from everyone. What each one of us represents.

Meera - Strength, Loyalty
Husna - Friendship, Depth
Yasmin - Positivity, Vibrant
Taranya - Love, Advice.

Me? - Motivation, Hardworking, Punctual

I disliked that description actually. I mean, 9 months with them and that's my impression on them? .. :/ And it's funny, the ironic of it. Before I even entered college, I was that girl who never studied. Who joined debate and choir and public speaking just to get out of class. I keep my homework to the last minute and have lost my books tons of times. Ask my parents to describe me in one word, and they'd say LAZY.

But now I'm known as the girl who motivates others to study. Who is hardworking, and determined in finishing my tasks. Who produces good results and always in time. Ironic ain't it? That I've changed. And I know I've changed. This makes my family happy though, I know and I can see it. I thought it's for the best too.
But I don't want to finish this foundation course and leave my housemates with a memory of me being hardworking.
That would so..suck. (excuse the language)

The last question was ''List down 10 things in the world that would make you happy'' .. I don't have a list. I should have one. But my housemate's lists are amazing.

Then, everyone except Yasmin, went to eat KFC. On the way home, we were talking about our PCP topics. We started from the conspiracy of Area 51, and then started talking about religion, and the apocalypse. The signs stated in the Quran, the Veda and the Bible. We found many similarities. Then we talked about the Da Vinci Code, The Holy Grail.. We talked about Nabi Mohammad, Jesus, Siva, Vishnu, Zeus, Hades, Poseidon.. We sat in the car and just talked. For almost an hour. Then we came up to the apartment and continued talking. About the Mona Fendy case. And stuffs. It was a good talk.

Then my group came over, and we started researching about the Bermuda Triangle. Having headache now. :/

The schedule for this week :

Tuesday - Complete lab report, complete maths homework, study for maths exam, study for physics exam
Wednesday - Study for bio exam, Complete the essay for Intro to Medic & Pharm
Thursday - Practice the Bon Odori Dance, Practice the GFE dance
Friday - Go rent the costumes, buy materials to make the lantern, MAKE the lantern, practice the Bon Odori dance

I have NOT started on any of them. Awesome right? And class is up to 6. imagine that ==''

Kayyy, not complaining :) Thank you God for this wonderful journey with all these wonderful people. Thank you for the awesome food, although I can't eat them because of my tonsils and bronchus. Oh yeah, thank you for making me unwell, so that I can't eat, so that I can loose weight! :) And thank you for my awesome family and friends. Anddd thank you for your love and kindness and forgiveness for all my sins. I'm sorry for all those times I've judged and gotten angry and those times I was unable to control my anger and my mouth. And thank you for giving us a wonderful Reflection teacher, who understands our hectic schedule and forget to scold us for not handing in our Diaries in months! Please make her not remember. And again, thank you for.. everything! :)

- I feel like a small kid saying a prayer -

To You

You know who you are.

Well, um, first, about the 'silent treatment' topic. I'm not a person who gives off the silent treatment, unless of course I need some time to think, not to avoid or anything. And when I read your post about you not liking that part of me -i guess-, I got a little angry. Because, in a way, who are you to judge me? And second, I don't remember EVER giving you the silent treatment before. So um..today, I gave you the silent treatment, because I was angry. But then, I just read another post, which I must've missed before, about you taking it back. So now I feel ridiculous. == Sorry about today..

And I'd like to comment on your ''Never ever use the silent treatment on me, if I jump into conclusion etc etc'' - the lesson here is NOT to jump into conclusion. Because sometimes, silent treatment is what people need. To take a step away from the problem, and not talk or deal with it, so one can get the better picture, and thus, solving it better. That's what works for me, maybe it's different for you I guess. But yeah, again, don't jump into a conclusion - that's the lesson for you.

And another thing..
About the you liking me bit.

I'm not sure if you still do after all this mess, but just in case..

I'm sorry, but I'm not the kind of girl you'd want to get involved with. You know what I think about relationships, and crushes, and love. I'm..let's say, complicated. So do yourself a favour, and get off this road. Because with me, on this kind of track, will definitely lead to a whole bunch of messes, or even destruction. It's not a warning, but its like a..um, additional information? haha ==

Plus, I'm in love with someone else. You know that. And I think I forever will be. Or at least till some other guy comes and prove me wrong, and I hope so, but that has not happen yet. And so I still stay this way.

Plus, I think..you're way over your head. Sorry if I'm wrong, but ..the way I see it. I think you're the kind that moves fast. You just met me, and you like me, you told me a week after that (which I thought you meant 'friend like' - I guess I can knock myself on the head ==). And when a day of me not replying your messages, you assumed it was the silent treatment and got all sulky and mad about it. And even when I liked your friend's post on your wall. The reason was because I thought he was being sarcastic. I didn't know he meant it in an insult. My fault on that, kinda hard to tell sarcasms through msn/facebook. But yeah, you jump, you leap, you move so fast.

The total opposite of me. I think, a lot. I need time. I think, I deliberate, I hesitate.. I'm scared, of choices.
And since you're a huge fan of HIMYM, you can say I'm like Robin. In fact, even when I watch the series, I can connect with her on so many levels.

But the main point of all these is that, there is someone else. Maybe I'm not 'it' for him, but I can't stop, not 'just like that'.

I'm sure you realise that I'm not giving you a firm NO, because I want you to decide to stop. It's much better that way right? :)

*white flag*

I do really value our friendship though. So..
please don't get mad at me for posting this :/

To all of you :)

“People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful you will win some false friends and true enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you’ve got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.”

- Mother Theresa

Life

I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.

For VTBY :]

Chapter 5

Reproductive system. I've always disliked this chapter, even since way back in high school. I thought it was lengthy and boring, and too many scientific words I had to memorise. I remember my classmates thinking I was weird. Cause you know teens and hormones. == Every time we get to this chapter, everyone gets super excited ..but I groan. haha..

Anyways, this is the first time the LECTURER gets wayyyy super excited than the students. And I find that SUPER ADORABLE. :] hahaha..kinda entertaining to watch. Mr. Eric. Who doesn't love him anyways? :)

Haha... Here's a few situations in our Reproduction class (courtesy of Mr. Joash Choo Xuein Khye) - I bet he doesn't even know I copied his fb statuses here.. :P

(in a class on the reproductive system)
Mr.Eric : students, i'm going to be a bit er, naughty in this chapter, cos i will ask the girls to explain about the male reproductive organs and the boys to explain about the female reproductive organs.
Joash : don't worry sir, i'm sure we've all got a lot of experience... in these matters.

Mr. Eric turned turned red :D I went 'awhhh'.. haha :)

(in a class on the reproductive system 2)
Mr.Eric: so do you guys want to have a break or go on to slide 50? cos we're at slide 49 now.
student (female): sir, just go on lah.
mr eric: okay.
*switches to next slide. the title is 'penis'*
...mr eric: *grinning cheekily* now i know why you wanted to go on to the next slide

=='' Hahaha.. *rolls eyes*

(in a class on the reproductive system 3)
Mr.Eric: mr joash, what is a woman?
Joash : er, a woman is a feminine counterpart to a man.
Mr.Eric : yes, but what do you think about women?
Joash: oh. they smell good, sir.
...*class erupts into laughter*

Hahaha, that was funny! :D Mr. Eric then went on to ask Ariff his opinion on women. To which Ariff replied something like 'complicated, hard to understand, sensitive'..and Mr.Eric replied ''Oh, careful Ariff..If not tomorrow we'll see you blue black with bengkak here and there''.. hahaha -courtesy of Ariff's girl, hahaha-

Mr. Eric makes this chapter kind of fun. :)
But I still dislike this chapter. Biologically I mean.

But on the reproductive part, I think it is one of God's most amazing gifts to mankind. :)

Blood Typing

Did the blood typing experiment in bio lab this week. I knew my blood type even before doing the experiment, but what the heck. :) They had to use this needle, the pen used by those with diabetes, to poke our fingers to get the blood sample. I watched all my friends getting poked first and all of them said there was no pain. That gave me courage I suppose. Taranya then poked my finger for me and I screamed. Literally.

It hurt. :(

Then I asked Vino, ''how come yours didn't hurt but mine did? :('' and she replied ''Nah, it hurt really bad. I just lied.''

Nice. haha..

My blood was a nice healthy red. And I dropped blood everywhere on the table except on the slide. Bad aimer. ==

Anyways, from the experiment, I discovered I was of blood group O positive. Yeah :D So before I get married (IF I do) I have to check to see if his blood matches mine :o - Miss Mun Yee's and Husna's advice..

Anyways, min showed me this : Characteristics of people with blood type O.

People with blood type O usually have a big role in motivating the passion of their groups and stimulating the harmonious relationship among the group members. They look like people who accept and do something calmly.

They are smart to cover up their feelings, so they look like people who are always cheerful, peaceful, and do not have problem at all. But, if they cannot bear it, they will surely find out a place or someone to talk.

They are kind, often do kindness, and are not reluctant to get out of their money to other people. They are actually stubborn too and have their own opinions about anything in confidence, but they are also flexible and easily accept new things. No wonder that they lean to be influenced easily by other people. Look like people who are temperate and believable, but they also often make big mistakes because of their careless characteristic. However, their characteristics make them lovable.

During the experiment, we discovered there were MANY O+ve. Like, literally. Me, Vino, Mero, Priyaa, Yasmin, Husna..and the list continues. :o

Shine

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same."

- Marianne Williamson

Spent the first quarter of the day sleeping.

The second quarter crying my eyes out.

The third, stuffing myself with food like koko krunch and nutella. And mixing them both.

There's another quarter left.
Maybe I should use it to finish my homework. Since I have tons.
When do I ever have none exactly?

'' Some of you might wonder what it's like to have a broken heart. For me, it's something like this ;
it makes you lose confidence in trusting someone..and it makes you not wanting to have a relationship..ever again''

Blue bicycle

"When I was younger, I used to ride my blue bicycle and wonder how far I could ride without turning back...''

There are many moments in a day when I stop myself to think, about everyone. And their talents.
I watch them doing their thing, in silence, but secretly pondering about the beauty of it. I stare in awe, amazed at what they can do. And wish I can do something like that too.
To be able to sing as awesome as Grace and Joyce can. To be able to do art as awesome as Vi and Grace can. To be able to dance as awesome as Mero and Priyaa can. To be able to speak as awesome as Ariff and Mero can.

"When I started screaming, I finally figured it out. I had always been afraid of not being able to see my future. Of not knowing what I want to do with my life Of not knowing why I don't know what I want to do. And of the days that kept flowing by mercilessly in spite of that"

I remember many years ago during one Sunday class, it was about talents and making use of them. Our teacher made us stand in front of the class and tell them our talents and how we plan to use them, in God's will. I made my teacher skipped me (we were going by rows, and I usually sit in front) so I could have a longer time to think. In the end, my answer was 'I don't know'. I remember feeling like crying, feeling like I had nothing to offer. Felt like I was different from any other person in the class. But my teacher was nice about it. She said to not worry, and that I still had time to figure myself out. I was only ten after all. I believed her.

I remember experimenting. I joined choir to see if I could sing as well as my friends could. Reality : I couldn't. I entered dance performances to see if I could dance. Reality : Was placed at the last row so that the audience could not see me. I started drawing, copying cartoons from Doraemon and Archie to see if I could draw well. Reality : Mum saw me struggling and started drawing the cartoons for me, so I could colour them. I started writing novels, carried a book with me everywhere I went. Eventhough I wrote more than 30stories, I never completed a single one. Reality : Because I felt I was doing it wrong every single time. even joined my brothers playing play station to see if I had a talent for scoring. Reality : I lost every game. I started playing sports too, but stopped when I fractured my ankle. Reality : I'm phobia of sports ever since, because the pain was so unbearable.

And many years later, today, I see myself as no different from the person I was back then.


"I realised why I was lost. It wasn't because I don't have a map, but that I don't have a destination"

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